"Sometimes it takes prayer and fasting."

*Note: The title of this post changed due to a re-drive by of the sign to which it pertains.

Since the time that I moved to Bloomfield I find that I am constantly asking God for confirmations. I have no doubt that I hear the Lord and that He speaks to me, but sometimes a litle clarification is nice. And I find that just as His Word states, when I seek Him I find Him.

I had a very bad day yesterday. VERY BAD! It started out bad and got worse and worse and worse. It finally ended with me sick and in bed (as my post from yesterday described). I was very discouraged and found myself in one of my ever-dramatic moods lying in bed asking, as in the Pslams "Why so downcast oh my soul?" (Literally, I did! Who actually says that?) Then I drifted to sleep. When I woke up, the Lord had alleviated my headache and I felt much better in my body but my emotions and mind were still very much in pain.

Much against my flesh I got my Bible out and read what has become my favorite Psalm and my prayer on a regular basis: Psalm 27. (I'm not gonna write it out, get out your Bible and check it out!) It's as if the Lord has really been testing me lately on verse 4: "One thing I ask of the Lord, this is what I seek: that I may dwell in the house of the Lord all the days of my life,". It's as if He's been saying "Do you really? Have you really read the rest of that Psalm? And if that is true, then why is your soul so downcast? You may not have everything else in your life that you want, but you can always have this ONE THING you ask of me. Seek me."

So, in the midst of my "pain" I sought Him. I talked to Him. I cried to Him. I sat with Him. He calmed my spirit and renewed my hope in Him. And finally, with all my cares and worries and fears cast upon Him, I was finally able to hear from His heart. I was really ready to seek HIM. Whatever He wanted to say was exactly what I wanted to hear.

Well, as I sat in His presence He brought to my mind a dream I had had several years ago. It was a dream about my family and different attributes that, as a family, He had given us. But in the dream there was also a clear message that somewhere along the way the Godliness in my family had been corrupted by wordly thinking and beliefs. I've sought the Lord on the full meaning of this dream for many years but have never had a peace that I have the full meaning. Then, in that time I felt the Spirit was gently "suggesting" that I fast. Then He gave me 3 clear objectives to pray for.

In addition, that is what led me to this blog. Alright, let me see if I can sum this up quickly....I know at least part of my moving here is because of unreconciled things within my family. (That was made clear as my brother's wedding came and went last week and so many feelings surfaced that I never expected.)I know that God has given me a passion for prayer, specifically intercessory prayer. BUT when I refocus and start to move in that passion I get hit. And I get hit HARD.(Hence my recent emotional breakdown over my haircut, my truck being broken into on Monday, and fiasco after fiasco after fiasco on Tuesday.) So, as I sat with Him last night I knew He was calling me to seek Him for the full meaning of that dream. But there was one "condition". That when I got it I would be responsible for it whatever He showed me. But, given how my last days have been, I was like, "God, I don't know if I can do this alone."(Then I got so disheartened because here I feel so very alone.) At that point, blogging came into my mind!

(Keep in mind that my pride also rose within me at this point because of points aforementioned in "Resistance is futile!" so none of this is really easy for me. But I desperately need a way to be connected to someone(s).)

Those of you who read this are people who I know understand the power and importance of prayer and understand the battle that comes with that. But more importantly than that, you understand the importance of funcitoning as a Body and uplifting and upholding one another in their trials. So, I'm asking you if you will join with my by praying for me in this time that I begin to fast and seek Him for my family. I'm not asking you to go into a time of fasting with me, but just to remember me in your prayers.

I feel so vulnerable here. So "uncovered". Through these feelings of vulnerability He's really teaching me how to hide in Him in times of attack and trial, but in this, well, I just didn't think it was wise to go at it all alone. And I felt I could count on you guys. Afterall, I trust you more than any other people I know. You get it. And you all are the ones that I look at as the best prayer partners ever!(Seriously, if I could have one day to do anything right now it'd be to get together with you Jesus freaks and PRAY and WORSHIP and PRAISE and just talk about HIM and to just have those times of just sitting in silence and hearing from the Spirit and then comparing "notes" to see get the full picture of what He is speaking....ahhhhh.....someday, maybe).

I will be posting when I'm gonna start this along with my three prayer points soon.
But, I want you to know that one way or another I know this is of God. How??? Well, the way that God confirms things to me these days is so grand. There is this one church on the way to my school that has a billboard that doesn't post cheesey sayings, but rather sayings that are in step with the Holy Spirit. And, like, almost totally without fail, it's what He's been speaking to me. So what did the sign read today??? Ta-da --> "Sometimes it takes prayer and fasting." HALLELUJAH! I almost peed my pants and drove into the ditch when I saw it!

I'm gonna do this no matter what, I just thought I'd ask for some support here in my HAVEN! (I'm gonna use that a lot, by the way.)

Consider it if you will. Thanks guys.